Should we or shouldn’t we have Children at our Wedding?
I love hearing couples ideas for their big days. One of the questions that pops up quite a bit is “What do you think about children at Weddings?”
It’s one of those topics that brings lots of opinions. I can only really speak from my own experience. So I’m going to tell you the pros and cons of what I think to Children at Weddings. Now please don’t hold it against me if you don’t like what I say but hopefully you’ll agree and it will help you make your own decision. Will we have Children at our Wedding?
Our own Wedding
So I thought a good place to start was at our own wedding. Now when we got married it was way back in Summer 2013. We didn’t have Children our selves at this point so didn’t really spend that much time around children. My cousins that I’m really close to had children and my best friends also had young children. So after counting up how many children there would be. It turned out we’d of had to invite 15 children under the age of 10. Now our wedding venue was near a lake so my concern that was if the children weren’t being watched they’d be off having a swim! So I thought I know I’m going to leave it up to them. I asked my cousins and friends if they would like their children to be there. Surprise surprise most of them came back saying they’d rather have the weekend off !! So that made our decision easy No Children at our Wedding. Everyone definitely made the most of having the weekend off!!
My experience from Weddings I’ve photographed
I’m going to share with you some of what I’ve experienced at Weddings. Now the obvious is that children definitely add the awwww factor to a wedding. I mean who doesn’t love a cute little page boy and flower girl walking down the aisle. A little girl in that awesome flower crown, or your nephew in that three piece suit. They do steel the show.
If your very particular about the details and you’ve pictured your big day since you were 10. Where Children are involved you have to take it with a pinch of salt. Everyone watches the Royal weddings with those perfectly behaved little flower girls and page boys, holding the flowers and the dress just right. Slowly and quietly walking down the aisle to sit there silently until the ceremonies over. Thats amazing but hey how many kids do you know that sit still for 5 minutes let alone a 40 minute ceremony. I know my children wouldn’t, not without bribery anyway. “Please sit quietly and you can have some sweets”
The Truth is
The truth is those gorgeous Little flower girls look amazing but will they act it. I think if you go into it knowing you might not get that perfect photograph of the flower girl walking down the aisle if she even does and you know that group picture might have a screaming child in the corner or one running away. Then hey what ever you get is a bonus.
To be honest they’ll probably find some parts of the day quite boring too, so getting a smile just might not happen. But this can make the cutest photograph.
I’ve had couples that have wanted the perfect shot of their nieces standing perfectly in the family picture, believe me I always try my hardest to have everyones attention but sometimes they just don’t want to play along. I think if you know this then great your just happy they were there.
Are you getting the day filmed ?
Also if your getting your ceremony and speeches filmed and you want to clearly hear what they are saying then maybe ask your guests (before the day) that do have children to take them out if they get upset and start to make noise. This way they don’t have to force the child to sit there quietly which can make it worse sometimes, everyone can feel relaxed and enjoy whats going on. Otherwise you’ll be able to hear those cries in your film, especially if they are sat near a microphone.
Also a great idea which a lot of my couples do is to have a little party bag for them at their seat at the table, everyone loves a party bag and it will keep them entertained, just maybe don’t put any whistles in there unless thats the theme your going for during your meal and speeches hahah. Personalised Colouring in is always a good one.
Keep them Entertained
At a number of my weddings Brides have really thought about what the children will want to do on the day and how to keep them entertained. Great ideas are lawn games they can play while everyones doing that boring bit and chatting over canapes.
Another popular one is a sweetie cart or chocolate fountain but be careful when you put this out to early could lead to lots of sugar rushes during your speeches haha. I think as the night do gets started is a good time. I’ve even had some weddings where they’ve had a soft play corner or they hire an entertainer especially for the children.
Bubbles is a great way to keep them busy after the ceremony too. Lots of my couples have had bubbles instead of confetti, the children always love it.
Also we all know weddings can be quite loud especially during speeches and the evening reception. So a good idea is ear defenders for the younger children, they allow them to enjoy it if they don’t like loud nosies or even sleep.
So Children at Weddings
My conclusion is it’s totally up to you hahah. I think if you invite children with an open mind that they won’t be those perfect “Royal Wedding Children” then what ever happens will be amazing. Lets not forget its exciting for them too.
Your open minded about the photographs you’ll get of them. You’re not bothered if they mess their dress up in the first 10 minutes. You love that they’ll steel the show with their cuteness.
Your happy for them to run around and enjoy them selves especially on the dance floor. I mean lets face it the dance floors never empty when children are invited.
But if you decide not to invite children then thats fine too, its your day and your guests will enjoy the time off like ours did. There maybe certain circumstances where your guest has to bring a child, like a newborn who’s breast feeding, but lets face it they’re no bother.
Or you might just want to invite your nephews and no else’s children thats cool too. Yes people might have opinions but I’m in the mind set of its your day you do it your way and everyone will love it!!
Here’s some useful links to some of the ideas I’ve mentioned.
wedding party Bags – Items to colour in
Bubbles – Confetti Bubbles
Ear protection – Baby ear defenders
I hope you’ve enjoyed reading this blog and if you’d like to have a further chat about your wedding plans just contact me today. I’m just going to leave you with one more photograph. This shot is from a few years ago now but its still one of my favourites. The Page Boys were stood waiting for the Bride to arrive, this is their reaction when they see her!!!! Children don’t hide any emotion good or bad. You’ve got to love them.